We just lost another combat veteran friend to suicide. He was loved. He was supported. He had children. He had a lot to live for.

He also was in pain. He had to have felt anguish and hopelessness. Now he is gone. It did not have to happen, but it did. We have to do better stopping veteran suicide.

I am neither a mental health professional nor a veteran, but I have lost family members and friends to suicide and considered suicide myself seriously enough to have planned it in detail. Here is what I see as some common threads.

Anyone can commit suicide. There is no stereotype.

People who commit suicide often give no advance clue to those around them. They assure family and friends they are fine. Reasons for suicide are diverse. They might include consequences of TBI and/or PTSD. There may be other changes in brain chemistry. Hopelessness. Lack of purpose. Isolation. Failure to meet one’s own expectations. Shame. Survivor’s guilt. Veterans often check these boxes at a higher rate than non-veterans.

Veterans served and sacrificed years of their lives to protect the rest of us. It is now our turn to return the favor. I do not have all the answers on how to do this, but I do have some ideas:

𝟭. 𝗘𝗹𝗶𝗺𝗶𝗻𝗮𝘁𝗲 𝘁𝗵𝗲 𝘀𝘁𝗶𝗴𝗺𝗮 𝘀𝘂𝗿𝗿𝗼𝘂𝗻𝗱𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝘀𝘂𝗶𝗰𝗶𝗱𝗲 𝗶𝗱𝗲𝗮𝘁𝗶𝗼𝗻.
In my view, it is common, normal, and part of the human condition, not a flaw or a sign of weakness. I disclosed my own suicide ideation to set an example. Let’s talk about suicide like we would talk about any other part of being human. Let’s dispel this part of a veteran’s isolation or shame and get the visibility to intervene at exactly the right time.

𝟮. 𝗘𝗺𝗽𝗹𝗼𝘆 𝘃𝗲𝘁𝗲𝗿𝗮𝗻𝘀.
This can help provide purpose, connection, and self-esteem.

𝟯. 𝗙𝗮𝗰𝗶𝗹𝗶𝘁𝗮𝘁𝗲 𝗰𝗼𝗻𝗻𝗲𝗰𝘁𝗶𝗼𝗻𝘀 𝗼𝗻𝗲-𝗼𝗻-𝗼𝗻𝗲 𝗼𝗿 𝗶𝗻 𝗴𝗿𝗼𝘂𝗽𝘀.
Be creative. We can all help veterans and their families be better connected.

𝟰. 𝗦𝘂𝗽𝗽𝗼𝗿𝘁 𝘁𝗵𝗲 𝗪𝗶𝗹𝗱𝗲𝗿𝗻𝗲𝘀𝘀 𝗛𝗲𝗮𝗹𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝗣𝗿𝗼𝗷𝗲𝗰𝘁
We recently founded a 501(c)(3) nonprofit to help veterans and their families through outdoor wilderness experiences provided free of charge. This includes hunting, camping, equine therapy, horseback riding, side-by-side trips, hiking, mountain scenery and peacefulness, and staring into a camp fire with other veterans. Consider donating at wildernesshealingproject.org to help us reach more veterans. 100% of all donations go directly to funding veteran services. The National Museum of Military Vehicles pays all administrative and overhead expenses.

𝟱. 𝗦𝘂𝗽𝗽𝗼𝗿𝘁 𝗼𝘁𝗵𝗲𝗿 𝗽𝗿𝗼𝗴𝗿𝗮𝗺𝘀 𝗵𝗲𝗹𝗽𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝗿𝗲𝗱𝘂𝗰𝗲 𝘃𝗲𝘁𝗲𝗿𝗮𝗻 𝘀𝘂𝗶𝗰𝗶𝗱𝗲.
There are many private programs that could use more visibility and participation, such as the Veterans Talking to Veterans Program created by Mentor Agility (mentoragility.com) and supported by the Wyoming Military Department (wyomilitary.wyo.gov) and Catholic Charities of Wyoming (charitieswyoming.org). Help spread the word.

𝟲. 𝗦𝘁𝗮𝗿𝘁 𝘆𝗼𝘂𝗿 𝗼𝘄𝗻 𝗽𝗿𝗼𝗴𝗿𝗮𝗺 𝘁𝗼 𝗵𝗲𝗹𝗽 𝘃𝗲𝘁𝗲𝗿𝗮𝗻𝘀.
Why not?

𝟳. 𝗧𝗵𝗮𝗻𝗸 𝘃𝗲𝘁𝗲𝗿𝗮𝗻𝘀 𝗳𝗼𝗿 𝘁𝗵𝗲𝗶𝗿 𝘀𝗲𝗿𝘃𝗶𝗰𝗲 𝗶𝗻 𝗮 𝗴𝗲𝗻𝘂𝗶𝗻𝗲 𝗮𝗻𝗱 𝗺𝗲𝗮𝗻𝗶𝗻𝗴𝗳𝘂𝗹 𝘄𝗮𝘆.
Make sure they know we “see” them and appreciate their service and their sacrifice on our behalf. Make every day Veterans Day, not just November 11.

To everyone reading this: 𝗪𝗵𝗮𝘁 𝗶𝗱𝗲𝗮𝘀 𝗱𝗼 𝘆𝗼𝘂 𝗵𝗮𝘃𝗲 𝗼𝗻 𝘄𝗵𝗮𝘁 𝗺𝗼𝗿𝗲 𝘄𝗲 𝗰𝗮𝗻 𝗱𝗼 𝘁𝗼 𝘀𝘁𝗼𝗽 𝗼𝗿 𝗿𝗲𝗱𝘂𝗰𝗲 𝘃𝗲𝘁𝗲𝗿𝗮𝗻 𝘀𝘂𝗶𝗰𝗶𝗱𝗲𝘀?

We have to work together to do better. We lose more veterans to suicide every single day.

𝗜𝗳 𝘆𝗼𝘂 𝗼𝗿 𝘀𝗼𝗺𝗲𝗼𝗻𝗲 𝘆𝗼𝘂 𝗸𝗻𝗼𝘄 𝗶𝘀 𝘀𝘁𝗿𝘂𝗴𝗴𝗹𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝗼𝗿 𝘁𝗵𝗶𝗻𝗸𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝗮𝗯𝗼𝘂𝘁 𝘀𝘂𝗶𝗰𝗶𝗱𝗲, 𝗵𝗲𝗹𝗽 𝗶𝘀 𝗮𝘃𝗮𝗶𝗹𝗮𝗯𝗹𝗲 𝗿𝗶𝗴𝗵𝘁 𝗻𝗼𝘄. 𝗬𝗼𝘂’𝗿𝗲 𝗻𝗼𝘁 𝗮𝗹𝗼𝗻𝗲 — 𝗽𝗹𝗲𝗮𝘀𝗲 𝗰𝗮𝗹𝗹 𝗼𝗿 𝘁𝗲𝘅𝘁 𝟵𝟴𝟴, 𝗼𝗿 𝗰𝗵𝗮𝘁 𝘃𝗶𝗮 𝟵𝟴𝟴𝗹𝗶𝗳𝗲𝗹𝗶𝗻𝗲.𝗼𝗿𝗴 𝘁𝗼 𝗰𝗼𝗻𝗻𝗲𝗰𝘁 𝘄𝗶𝘁𝗵 𝘀𝘂𝗽𝗽𝗼𝗿𝘁 𝟮𝟰/𝟳.

~ 𝗗𝗮𝗻 𝗦𝘁𝗮𝗿𝗸𝘀, 𝗙𝗼𝘂𝗻𝗱𝗲𝗿, 𝗡𝗮𝘁𝗶𝗼𝗻𝗮𝗹 𝗠𝘂𝘀𝗲𝘂𝗺 𝗼𝗳 𝗠𝗶𝗹𝗶𝘁𝗮𝗿𝘆 𝗩𝗲𝗵𝗶𝗰𝗹𝗲𝘀

This post builds on what we published on November 10 (see above) regarding veteran suicide. In that post, I asked people to weigh in with ideas on what we can do to stop or reduce veteran suicides. A friend who is a Navy Corpsman combat veteran and Associate Dean of Men at Hillsdale College responded with great wisdom and gave me permission to re-post his letter.

Below is his letter in its entirety. Please spread the word and keep the ideas coming:

Dan,

I read your piece on Veteran Suicide, and it truly saddened me to hear about your friend.

I too have lost friends, co-workers, and fellow Sailors and Marines to suicide. Like you, I’ve thought long and hard about what can be done to confront this epidemic.

I agree completely that this conversation needs to happen more often—and not behind closed doors.

It should be a kitchen table topic, something we can speak about openly and honestly.

Intergenerational Mentorship
• Pairing veterans with at-risk youth, college RAs, or even ROTC students gives vets a chance to lead again.
• Passing on discipline and resilience reframes their experience as valuable — not tragic.
• This restores purpose and the “protector” role in a new context.

Spiritual and Moral Reconciliation
• Many veterans carry unseen spiritual wounds — guilt, betrayal, or loss of faith.
• Chaplain-led retreats or veteran-specific confession spaces can provide real healing.
• These programs focus not on diagnosis, but on forgiveness, meaning, and belonging — often the missing pieces in suicide prevention.

Veteran-Led Economic Cooperatives
• Giving veterans ownership in small businesses or co-ops creates long-term stability and pride.
• Example: A veteran-owned carpentry shop or auto garage where profits and leadership rotate among members.
• It meets three needs at once: employment, community, and dignity.

Training Civilians to Listen Differently
• The burden shouldn’t fall only on vets — communities often don’t know how to engage them.
• Teaching civilians to “listen without fixing” or to invite veterans into meaningful roles can be life-saving.
• Churches, campuses, and employers can host “Veteran Story Nights” or “Mission Debriefs” that allow honest conversations to happen naturally.
(Almost like a “train the trainer,” as we would say in the military.)

Restoring Tribe
• The loss of tribe after service is one of the most dangerous shifts.
• Rebuilding that tribe — through mission trips, leadership development, or service projects with civilians — can recreate the sense of belonging that prevents despair.

All of these ideas take time, but I believe it’s in the small things — in the simple moments, in the “little” — that much can be found.
Sometimes healing begins not with a program, but with presence, a shared meal, or a listening ear.

That’s what we do with student veterans here at Hillsdale.

Very Respectfully,
Jeffery Rogers
Associate Dean of Men
Hillsdale College

If you or someone you know is struggling or thinking about suicide, help is available right now.
You’re not alone — please call or text 988, or chat via 988lifeline.org to connect with support 24/7.